A Mom

I'm a lot late with this post, but it's about what I love most. Being a mama to Z-Man and Miss Mills. 

Let me tell you a story.

 I did not want kids. Not even a little. Ryan did.

 Rhyno loves and idolizes his grandpa. This grandpa got pretty sick. One night, Rhyno sits me down and tells me he wants to start trying for a baby. I call him crazy and selfish and it's my body that has to go through all that and I don't want to do it. He then pulls this line out, "I really want my grandpa to be able to meet at least one of my kids." I melted. Rhyno has a way of getting to that soft spot in my heart, but this one topped the cake. I stopped taking the "the pill" the next day. I was terrified. Every month when sweet aunt flo came I was so relieved.

 I pretended to be sad. 

Then the day happened. I was one day late....2 red lines. 

Then something weird happened. I was kind of excited. The next few weeks I went back and forth. Most of the time I was so scared because I had gotten guilted into having a baby. The second I heard that little heart beat I turned into a mom. I worried about that little baby in me to no end. I'll forever hold an extra special place in my heart for my Z-Man because he made me a mama. 

Then this little surprise came. This little one is truly an angel sent to me. 

ps- Grandpa is still here with us. But I can't for a second feel bad about that guilt trip!